Gimme a P. Gimme an R. Gimme an O-G-R-E-S-S.

Posted on February 9, 2013 by The Boy

PROGRESS! (Disclaimer: The Boy wrote this post, but The Girl totally titled it.)

I really enjoy taking things apart. Breaking things. Taking a whole and turning it back into parts. I was very gung-ho about the demo of the bathroom and closet that we’re turning into a walk-in and master bathroom. Now that we’re almost at the end of the demo process, however, I am less enthusiastic.

The reason I like demo so much is that you really can’t screw it up, at least if you do controlled demo (which the girl is NOT fond of). Sorry DIY network and HGTV, we have to do clean-up ourselves, so controlled demo wins out over throwing a hammer through a window just to watch stuff break.

Unfortunately, it is VERY easy to screw up the building process. Hang the drywall wrong or don’t mud it properly and the walls will never be smooth. Forget to secure every piece of plumbing and you’ll end up with a mold problem. You get the idea. For the bathroom project, we are actually knocking down old walls and putting up new walls, so we have to get everything right all the way to the framing.

I tried to tackle this myself.

This is wrong, for so many reasons.

I didn’t secure anything in place, because I did everything wrong. So, I did what I always do when The Girl and I have gotten ourselves in over our collective heads: I called Miguel. Miguel has the right tools for the job, and in this case that included a brain that contained all the requisite knowledge of how to frame a wall. In exchange, I promised Miguel that I would bbq some ribs. This is our standard deal: he provides information, tools, and knowledge, I provide bbq. Hey, know your strengths.

Except, I forgot to take the ribs out of the freezer to thaw them. Basically just a fail weekend for me. So, I ran out and grabbed a couple of t-bones and threw ’em in a marinade while Miguel and I worked.

Here’s what we accomplished: frame out the new walls in the bedroom to close off the old closet and create an opening for the new door to the walk-in; frame out the wall in the hallway to close the old entrance to the bathroom; take out all the old framing that we didn’t need anymore. Looks simple, but it took a while considering we killed the old air compressor and had to go pick up a new one. Yay unexpected costs! (sarcasm…deep deep sarcasm)

New compressor – yay.

Miguel, doing things correctly.

He’s so good he can do it with his eyes closed.

Now, all we have left to do is just swing that electrical box on over to the new wall which should be TOTALLY easy! (I will be looking to recruit Miguel for this job too, so I hope he’s not reading this particular post.)

So Miguel held up his end of the bargain. New walls were framed and old walls were removed. My turn to at least make good with the steaks since I forgot to thaw out the ribs. Oh wait – out of propane for the grill. Yes, I use propane and not charcoal. Yes, I know charcoal makes the food taste better, and yes, I know I won’t truly be a real man until I learn to cook with charcoal. Although, every commercial I see on tv tells me that after I hit 35 years old, my testosterone levels plummet, and I stop being a man, so it might be too late for charcoal to help much.

SO. No ribs. No propane. I ended up cooking the steaks on the stove. I was embarassed. It felt like a material breach of the contract between Miguel and myself, and to be honest, I’m not sure I can convince him to come help again. Unless I add beer to the offer. That usually works on me.

The Girl cut a piece of drywall to cover the new framing in the hallway so that you couldn’t just stare directly into the bedroom from the hall. So productive she is!

THAT is a hallway.

The drywall worked out great until my brother crashed here late one night, and he hadn’t been to the house since the bathroom reno started. He stopped to catch some zzzzs after performing at a music show locally (check out his music!). He got up in the middle of the night to use the bathroom and walked right into the newly hung drywall. He was thoroughly confused, but found his way to the other bathroom and everything worked out alright.

Now, about that electrical box…ugh. Another day. February 16th, to be exact.

BBMD = Breaker Box Moving Day!

Naked Tomorrow

Posted on January 29, 2013 by The Girl

The Boy recently introduced me to Macklemore’s latest hit, Thrift Shop, which is sweeping the nation, and perhaps the world. Since I only listen to talk radio in the car (I’m such a nerd!) he had to fill me in on the latest happenings in “real” radio. I’ll admit, the song is catchy, hilarious, and holds a special place in my thrift-loving heart.

I got thrifty AND crafty in celebration of MLK’s birthday, and wanted to share all the deets. I was headed to the gym that fateful morning, when I passed my favorite thrift store, and saw a packed parking lot and signs for 50% off EVERYTHING. Obviously I slammed on brakes and pulled in. It was a madhouse. And no, I never made it to the gym, but I looked very sporty in my workout clothes, and called to ask about kickboxing classes from the parking lot, so that is just like working out, right?? Right.

This is the beauty that caught my eye:

I have been wanting a container with a spout for my laundry detergent for quite some time, thanks to some evil genius on Pinterest, and this giant jug won my heart. The price tag did, anyways:

$4.99 and 50% off? SOLD. She was a little plain Jane, but I knew I could fix that. There was already a hole in the side and a spout taped inside the jug, so I just had to assemble. Also, the top was just a plastic open ring, so I cut a piece of cork to size and simply super glued it on. I browsed the interwebs for cute laundry signs, slogans, etc., and settled on this one:

I can hear your sighs of relief that this post wasn’t an annoucement that The Boy and I are running away to join a nudist colony. That wouldn’t be good for anyone, except The Dog, who is always shamelessly naked. I didn’t like the white on beige contrast, and I wanted the paper to look a bit aged, so I soaked some coffee in water, squished it up a bit, and “painted” it onto the paper. Once dry, it looked exactly the way I had hoped, and matched the jug perfectly.

A little mod podge to hold in place, a few coats over it to make it moisture-resistant, and voila!

Here’s the catch, because you know I share it all – I am admitting for the first time that the dispenser method may not be the most practical. When shopping for furniture, clothing, housewares, pretty much anything, The Boy prefers function over form. He just doesn’t care about aesthetics. (“This puke green couch is super comfortable, plus it has a pull-out bed! It’s perfect!” or “NO. You CANNOT move the knife block left three feet because then it is not right where I prep food and thus it is NOT convenient.” or “Absolutely not. You cannot put a dresser in a CLOSET. It makes no sense.”) These are the battles I face. I’m sure ~~no one~~ everyone feels very sorry for me and my struggles.

The problem is that the detergent comes out veeeerrrrrryyyyyyy slowly. Painfully slow. Then, when you finally have enough detergent (or you are too impatient to keep waiting and say screw it and use 2/3 of the recommended amount), you pull your little cup away … and it drips. Several large drips. Even if you scrape off a few of the drips, they keep coming. And where do they land? On top of the washing machine. Sigh. The Boy did laundry this past weekend, and I kept waiting for his disgusted comments about HOW DUMB the new detergent dispenser was, but he never said a word, which only means one of two things: (1) He did laundry WITHOUT detergent, which is entirely possible; or (2) He used the extra container of detergent and never touched the jug.

Any guesses?

Here is The Boy’s response after reading this post:

I’m just glad he didn’t go with solution number 1. This is proof that men can be trained!

Warp Speed Table Transformation

Posted on January 24, 2013 by The Girl

My friend Marty had a problem. She hated her kitchen table, but didn’t want to buy a new one, since there was nothing “wrong” with the dining set, except wear and tear and, well, some ugly. I was due for a visit so I packed up my tools and drove over on Friday after work. We relaxed on Friday night, caught up, played with the kids, and got working Saturday morning. I always underestimate things – how much primer we will need, how long the project will take, how much it will rain, how many blisters I will get, how hard a child can work, etc. We had to sand the table top down to bare wood, prime all of the chairs, paint all of the chairs, prime the base of the table, paint the base of the table, stain and polyurethane the table top, and reupholster the seats of the chairs. In a day and a half. Yup. We were attempting to complete a 4 day project in less than half that time. However, another thing I underestimated was how much we both wanted to finish this table, so we made it happen. We started by taking the seats off of the chairs and dragging them into the backyard, where we sanded them to scuff them up and started priming.

Marty Table

Aaaannnnddd then it started drizzling, so we moved the party to the garage and started sanding the table top. Here is what we started with:

Marty Table

Of course, I forgot to take true “before” photos because I was eager to get down to work. However, I stopped early on in the sanding to document the depressing state of this table. Also, you can see how much priming of the chairs we accomplished before the weather intervened. It became pretty clear that we were gonna need help.

Marty Table

Child labor laws? What child labor laws? Marty’s son and his friend did a great job and followed my instructions perfectly. They might have even had a little fun. Maybe.

At some point we stopped working to take a trip to Home Depot and also to Joann’s Fabric to pick out some material for the new chair seats while primer dried. The rest of the day involved a LOT of sanding, priming and moving chairs in and out of the cover of the garage as it rained off and on. We finished sanding the table top and got two coats of stain on before bedtime. While relaxing a bit and watching TV in the evening we re-covered a few of the chairs. Not a bad first day.

Marty Table

The lighting in the garage made all of the sections look different shades – but they are not!

Marty Table

Sunday morning was a little slower. After a cup of coffee or two (or eight), we ventured back out and managed to get a coat of paint on all of the chairs, which took FOREVER. We also flipped the table over onto a tarp, taped it off around the edges, primed the base, got one coat of paint on it, flipped it back over, and put one coat of polyurethane on the top. It was a lot of hard work, but it was really exciting seeing everything come together!

A few regrets: over-eager sanding which went through the veneer in one spot (it took stain pretty well and isn’t too noticeable, but I still feel bad about it – I can’t even blame it on the kids!) and OIL-BASED PAINT. I understand the benefits of oil-based paint. I really do. But it is NOT worth it when you are painting with a brush into a gazillion cracks and crevices. It was like trying to spread bubble gum onto every blade of grass in an acre using toothbrush. Maybe that is an exaggeration – but not much. Plus, clean up is a losing battle with oil-based paint. We threw away the brushes, and I went to work with paint on my legs for days. I have still a few streaks in my hair too, but I figure I will just look like I am aging gracefully until it eventually wears off.

In the late afternoon, we finished re-covering the seats, and then I had to head home. Marty was on her own! She put finishing touches of paint on the chairs, sanded the top of the table and put the second coat of polyurethane on, and re-assembled the chairs. She did a fantastic job! I am impressed that she got it done so quickly, and by Tuesday I had the “ta dah!” photos I had been waiting on.

MartyTable1

MartyTable2

Marty chose to alternate the fabric on the chairs, and although I was skeptical at first, I really love how it turned out. Best of all, she is thrilled with the results and has vowed to stop using her table as a storage and dumping ground. So far so good, right?

I have to end this post with a picture that is oozing with adorable:

Marty’s husband, baby, and the neighbor’s puppy. Cute overload!

I thought this project would make Marty swear off furniture refinishing, but it had the opposite effect. I am slowly converting people, one at a time! No one is safe … who is next?